77p egg: Eggwife is a crude, gory, toilet-humour-driven first-person shooter inspired by the likes of Postal 2, Duke Nukem 3D, Goat Simulator, and a general tone of "good enough" during development; an attempt at embracing the jankiness that comes with making your first game.

Set in Sheffield, England, you play as 77p egg; a potty-mouthed stick figure briefly mourning the loss of its wife, who finds itself on an epic adventure when a trip to the supermarket to find a new life partner gets a little bit weird.

• Fight your way through angry hordes of sentient sewage, such as gelatinous blobs of urine, mechanised napalm poo tanks, 4ft long tampon helicopters laced with nails, and many more. There's a milk-worshipping cult too and they're also pretty upset.
  
  
• 15 levels (this number might grow), including a supermarket, cyberspace, the beautiful English countryside, and, yeah... sewers. Sorry Civvie.
  
  
• Blast your enemies with an arsenal of """UK-Legal""" weaponry such as the Applicator - a scoped, long-range tampon applicator; the 7-Barrel Sh*tgun; the Crossbowner - a silicone-shootin' crossbow designed for the bedroom; the Stigmatic 77,000 - a high-power, high rate-of-fire nailgun; and many more!!!
  
  
• Master various bodily functions and fast-paced movement to stay alive!! Strafe-running, unlocked vertical aiming (okay that one isn't crucial at all but feels cool/stupid) and poop-jumping will keep you one step ahead of your foes. Pee on command to put out fires (even ones on yourself!), incapacitate certain enemies, or just draw pretty pictures on walls. Make sure to eat lots of food to keep your poop meter full - you'll need it not only to stock your Sh*tgun, but to double jump too!
  
  
• Five difficulty levels: "flaccid", "Semi", "HARD", "RAGING", and "dysfunction" - the latter of which randomises much of the game's content such as the rotation of level geometry, damage amounts, movement, and much more; making it potentially much easier to complete a level, or perhaps impossible.
  
  
• An endless wave-based arena mode with its own arenas, a card-picking system for powerups and powerdowns, and some unique enemy variants!
  
  
• An original soundtrack by General Mumble, sc.Dave!, ipi, Koa, and probably more to come; spanning all sorts of genres from metal to ambient to reggae to... *checks wikipedia...* s-...scrumpy & western.

Do you have what it takes to help 77p egg find love once again? Just making sure you don't forget that's what this game is about.